Extending A Hand - Blog Off

When I think back to the mentors, teachers, professors, family, and friends who extended their hand to me, at the times when I needed them to, it is rather amazing! They say it takes a village to raise a child and I believe that cliché is true, for it was so with me. I had many people in my realm who saw me as "different" and so they challenged me in appropriate ways; and as I seem to have been born with a thirst for learning, they helped to instill a strong level of personal responsibility within me regarding it. That continued into my early adulthood, I sought strong individuals whose integrity was at the forefront, and I learned much from their wisdom.

Now the tables have turned and it has been my turn to mentor and teach. How that happened is really anyone's guess! I suppose we are pulled to certain areas for certain reasons. Although I have been doing aspects of this work for many years, I am still surprised when a client or student quotes me. I suppose it means that they are actually listening. So it is then that I do my best to mention something that they too have said, after all, the most interesting interactions are mutual!

We have a tendency to forget and value the connections we can make with other people. Although we are a part of a "Global Community" it is rare for North Americans to really think that way. We're more concerned with our "immediate communities" our own friends and families. Most people do not think further than their immediate (or core) group of people. Even in cities, we see such a separation between groups, and that is really to our detriment. Opening ourselves up to see others as the same as us really helps to build bridges between groups. If we cannot even do that in our own communities, dare we even say that we, individually, are a part of the Global Community? It has to start somewhere.

What I have learned is this: people don't need a hand-out and rarely do they truly need a helping hand, what most people appreciate is an extended hand. To extend our hand (metaphorically or in reality) we are saying to the other person, "I respect you and I am meeting you on even ground." That is what the people who helped to guide me did. They respected me enough to meet me on even ground and challenge me and share their wisdom from that place. We have a choice, always, when we interact with others. We can view them as: above us, beneath us, or with us on the journey. I prefer to walk with others, when I'm not walking alone, and I find it far easier to converse when I'm not looking ahead to someone or looking back to them but looking at them face to face. Sometimes, it really is that simple.

- Kai